Sunday, September 21, 2008

BIRTHDAY MEMORY

I love birthdays. They are monumental for me. Each year is a testament to the fact that I'm still here and have that much more knowledge.
Some of my birthdays have been fraught with worry. Like when I turned 25, 30 and 35. I don't know why, but it seemed like life was falling short of my dreams. Each one came and went with no husband and no children. Now I revel in that freedom. My love can be poured out on my nephews instead of progeny of my own.
One birthday that really stands out in my mind is my thirteenth. We were going to a cabin in the mountains with some family friends. We spent several days cooking and baking good things to eat. My mom had me bake a chocolate cake from scratch, and showed me how to make homemade chocolate icing for on it. Everyone else liked peanut butter icing, but chocolate is my favorite. We made macaroni salad, potato salad, cut up cheese and bologna cubes, cucumber slaw, cole slaw and pea salad. Then we baked a meatloaf and sliced it up for sandwiches on homemade bread. This was going to be a great weekend!
There was one huge problem though. No one said a single word about my birthday being on Saturday. I helped get our clothes together, along with towels and blankets. My youngest brother was only three, so we had to pack lots of extra stuff for him. When we loaded the truck I saw each bag, box and cooler. There were no presents for me. I didn't ask any questions. I just felt real sad and empty inside. No one had asked what I wanted either. We weren't allowed to ask for things.
When we left home on Friday, I just decided to think of the trip as my present. Then I got angry because everyone else was sharing my gift. It was beautiful at the cabin. There was a creek nearby that we played in. My birthday is May14th, so lots of new plant life was just peeping out for the new season.
After dinner on Saturday night Mom told me to get that cake I had made. I was so surprised when I took the foil off that pan. She had decorated it with colored icing Friday night after we kids went to sleep. It was very pretty with flowers and my name on it. There were gifts for me, too! I don't remember what they were any more, but I know they were things that I had seen in a little gift shop we had stopped at on the way up there. I knew better than to ask for anything, but that didn't stop me from looking at the cool stuff. I got a warm feeling when everyone told me how good my cake tasted. It was like I was giving a gift to them on my birthday.
That was a wonderful day. I won't ever forget it even though the gifts escape me yet. Surprise birthdays are the best!

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